We think it's a boy

I think we are getting a boy. THINK. We pretty much thought there was a higher chance for this because there are lots of waiting families for girls, but now I am about 85% sure. But, this is an adoption which means anything goes.

Last week our agency called and wanted to know if we would consider twins with a 5 year old sibling. Umm...WHAT? Luckily, they called Josh at work. I may have just said yes without thinking. He called me and we were both just a bit thrown off. 3 children! As much as I would love to scoop them all up, I know that we couldn't be the best parents to them. Going from zero to 3 at one time... as first time parents?? A bit overwhelming. We had to tell them that's not really what we are capable of parenting right now and we don't want to get in over our heads and not be able to be the best parents we can to them. Let's just say this really really sucked. I felt selfish and well...just wrong to say no. Somehow, they read our home study preference wrong and thought we wanted to adopt a few children at once. Talk about a paperwork mistake!

Anyways, we got everything cleared up and our agency told us that because we are open to a boy or a girl, that they think our wait will go quickly as there are 8 families waiting for a girl...so that's gotta mean less families, maybe considerably less, waiting for either a boy or either gender. A boy...a son. Wow.

My nesting is actually turning out to be quite a productive activity for the Hunt household. Everything is finding a place, a need and if not then it's being donated. I would even donate "the evil cat" if Josh wouldn't notice he was missing. Okay, okay...he is kind of (and I'm really stressing kind of) growing on me. I moved my ReLive business to my house this weekend so that I can be set up at home and be near my family when I'm working on my products and orders (although I must admit I would like to be working on a LOT more orders). Looks like next up will be a bathroom remodel (on a tight budget I might add) and then the baby's room once we get a referral.

Ethiopian courts opened today after the close for the rainy season! I'm excited to start seeing a lot of families getting court dates and passing. I'm seeing so many families not passing court the first few times and even going into 3, 4 and 5 times before passing! The online adoption community is becoming my strength and guidance needed to keep me balanced during this wait. I hope and pray that we get a referral before the end of 2009. I'm shooting further out there in hopes we get one soon. Very soon.

Spinning with questions

I think I'm "nesting." I want to rearrange, organize, get rid of stuff we don't use...get MORE space! Granted, I've always been a little (or a lot) like this. I would rearrange my bedroom as a girl until I moved furniture around so much it would barely stay together. This went on as a teen, in college and so forth.

Now, I'm looking around our house imagining where everything is going to go. And, there's so much to do! So many home projects that need to actually come to life. Now is the time. The time to jump on this before we have a little one. Ah...I wish we could take off a month and do all these little projects now before we bring someone new home.

I do suppose all these things will keep us busy. And, I need busy. I need something to take my mind off of the wondering and the flow of questions that constantly surround us. When are we going to get a referral? How long will it take to get a court date? How many times will we have to go through court before we pass? How long will we wait to travel? And HER??? Who is SHE? What's her story? What will lead her to give up her baby? Does she know right now...right at this moment... that this is what she or her family will decide? Will we meet? I find myself always wondering about her. This person, this family. This woman that will change so many lives forever.

I'm checking our Yahoo adoption group several times a day. I want to see other families getting referrals...something that gives me HOPE that ours is coming soon. Yes, we have not been on the list even a month yet, but we really have felt we would be oh-so fortunate and have a short wait. I better get this waiting thing mastered. My heart goes out to the families I'm reading about that have waited weeks, months and years. I could not even imagine.

I love these!

I can not wait to purchase these headphones and put them on our little wee one! They look so adorable.

So much to plan...

So, here I am. Working. As I always do. Imagining what it will be like to try to pull this off with a little one pulling on my arm. When I think about it, it truly does amaze me how women raise families, manage households, be a wife and have a career. And the same for fathers!

I've got the career part down. Check and then check again. Two companies and feeling pretty successful with what I've done with my career.

Household Management. Check. Although, I must admit I am not alone in that job role.

Throw in a baby...and I'm surrendering. I am overwhelmed by what that means for me. How do I do it all? Well, I simply don't. I'm making myself get into the mindset of stepping back and doing what I can with my career while I take a new path in life as a mother. I look forward to more peaceful days of walking in the park and sitting on the porch rocking our baby.

How do you not loose yourself while being the best mother you can be? I think parents shape the life of every human being. Your goals, motivations, morals...for the most part laid out by your parents. We are not the average couple. We don't clock in and clock out. We take those late night phone calls when something at a show goes wrong, when someone is not on the guest list and is freaking out about it or when a band is about ready to walk and not play their set. I don't necessarily want to throw that away. I want a break from it, yes. But, it is my life. It is OUR life together. And I do enjoy it. I just don't enjoy HOW much it runs my life now. I suppose there will be times when we are toting around a toddler at a show. Just hopefully, he/she won't turn into a groupie. :)

And we are officially WAITING

We just got put on the Waiting List today! I can't believe how fast that was from finishing our paperwork. I am in shock. And, all of a sudden...terrified! It's happening so fast.

yea!!

My favorite...

My favorite new poem:

"Never forget for a single minute you didn't grow under my heart, but in it. Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone, but still miraculously My Own."

-author unknown

Dossier is complete!

It's done! It's in the mail to Washington DC. I am so excited this part of the journey is complete. I feel a huge weight off our shoulders. A big exhale! We should know in a few weeks when we've been added to the Waiting List.