Christmas Eve and restless

6am Christmas Eve morning...couldn't sleep. I've either slept too much the last couple of days or it's the wondering...the what if's...the swarm of thoughts filling my head that woke me up early this morning. I typically need more sleep than anyone I know (I'm talking like a good 10-11 hours would be perfect!), but I can't right now. Hate to say it, hate to think it, but I'm wondering if anything will happen today. If any phone call will come our way. I know I said I wasn't going to hold my breath and I'm not. I'm just innocently wondering. I keep thinking, what is our future child doing right now? He/She (although I'm feeling "he") is alive. Breathing, crying, squirming. I just desperately need a little face to put to all my thoughts. If that little face could come today, that would be simply amazing. Here's to a long day. I'm sure I will be crashed out for a lovely afternoon nap at some point. Happy Holidays to you all!

Some good news

Josh talked with our agency this morning and we are #2 on the waiting list!! We were told around the first of the year we SHOULD have a referral....maybe, just maybe around Xmas. Wow. We have been worried and concerned with issues that had arisen concerning our agency and I still have a lot of doubt and uncertainty, but we are moving ahead and staying put. We are so close. The owner of the agency is in Ethiopia right now working hands on with the orphanages to make sure things get in order and that the families waiting on the correct paperwork can get that.

We are so excited and can not wait to get this phone call. Having an idea of when helps boost our spirits so much. I'm going to focus on January and not hold my breath for a Xmas referral. I don't want to be disappointed. This way, if it does come early it will be the best Xmas ever.

Over the weekend, I saw photos of the babies in the orphanages our agency works with. Beautiful, beautiful babies and children. I can't wait for them all to find homes. I wonder if we've already seen ours. Such a weird feeling.

By the way, this necklace pictured is available for purchase at http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vt_related_1&listing_id=36981304. I bought one!

A little rambling...

We did a little browsing this weekend in the baby section at Nebraska Furniture Mart. Just a good idea to get a number of what this is all going to cost. Our plan is to not go baby crazy with getting furniture and gadgets we don't need. I want to keep it as simple as possible.

So, I'm back to the decluttering (yes, we really have/had that much stuff) and we just did a big room rearrangement so we can clear out one of our bedrooms for a baby room. Painting our home office is on the agenda this week. Good thing, as I'll be spending a lot of time at home once we are parents and being able to work at home when I need to is an amazing luxury.

In the middle of all these little home projects, I have been reading. I love reading and for about 5 years I quit reading books altogether. I had gotten so caught up in running a business I never made the time. Now, I find the time and I realize how much I missed out on. Being able to read, escape and draw up images in my mind from someone else's word...I love it! I recently finished, There Is No Me Without You by Melissa Fay Greene.

Let me just say that I fell in love with this book. It's about an Ethiopian woman that opens her heart and home to orphans. This was an emotional read and I cried my way through and felt like I had taken a journey when I was finished. In continuing to read about Africa, I'm onto Say You're One of Them by Uwem Akpan.

This week we are hitting the coldest weather yet for the season. This is when this long winter wait is really annoying. I'm missing spring and summer badly. Evenings of sitting on my porch with a glass of wine or taking the dogs for a walk. I barely can get that in during the winter as it's dark by the time we are home. Oh, spring...you hold so much hope for us. I guess all these home projects couldn't happen at a better time. I need to stay busy so I don't dwell on this wait!